The problem isn’t this blog or it’s topics. The problem is me.

I was feeding my son this morning and we were having a rough time … he just leaked pooped out of the side of his diaper, I had to go change my clothes, change him and get everything all cleaned up … I figured there was no point in trying to go back to sleep. Once he finally got back to sleep I just sat there for a while with him in my arms thinking about what I could possible write a blog post about today. I have been discourage lately because of the lack of time and effort that I have been putting into maintaining and updating this blog, and each time I try to think of posts I spend more time addressing the fact that the blog isn’t as busy as it used to be. Before my family and I moved in February I had over 20 posts just sitting in the scheduled queue waiting to post and other 10 or so drafted waiting to be finalized to the post of publishing. As a stay at home mom, I had more time to dedicate to writing, now that I am working full time trying to take care of our home everyday, I have no new posts scheduled and a handful of drafted posts that I have started but never finished because I just lack the passion to finish them.

I started to think that maybe this blog just wasn’t for me any more and that it was time to move on. I contemplated closing the blog a few times but that solution just didn’t seem right either. So I started to really focus on the topics I typically discus, asking myself ‘what haven’t I shared that I want to’ and while all my topics are extremely important to me, nothing brought me out of my seat. So I tried thinking out of the box … where are my priories right now … what am I doing everyday that is motivating and driving my inspiration today. That is when it hit me. It isn’t the blog that is the problem at or it’s topics. The problem is me. I am in a period of my life where I am lacking any passion at all.

My life has entered one of those lulls where everything is just routine and maintenance and lukewarm activities. I have become so consumed by my work and my responsibilities at home that I didn’t leave any room for fun and excitement.

I am so grateful and excited that God brought me to a quite place this morning and revealed this truth to me because just knowing where I am is a huge leap to getting out of it.

So as soon as my husband wakes up, we are making some plans to take some type of mini vacation where I can just relax, be free, escape the daily routines and connect with myself , my husband and my son again. And hopefully come back with a renewed energy and drive for life and this blog.

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Just like many of you other mothers out there, life and love took on a whole new meaning once I looked into the eyes of my first new born child. I really thought I understood love when I met my husband, but no, this is a totally different kind of love. I now live to ensure that the growth, life and environment is the best it can be for my baby and even more so now for my husband. That is why I am now seriously taking the time to look into life insurance.

You might be asking yourself what love and life insurance in common. More than you might realize! Simply put, life insurance is a product you purchase because you love someone and want to make sure they’ll always be protected financially, even after you’re gone.

As we know from the Valentine’s Day celebrations taking place in classrooms and romantic restaurants everywhere, love and fun go hand-in-hand! To get Americans thinking about life insurance as an expression of enduring love, the nonprofit LIFE Foundation is sponsoring the Crazy4Love Photo Contest. From now until February 19, you’ll be able to visit the popular microblogging website tumblr.com and share a photo that captures how you’ve expressed your love to someone dear to you. One Grand Prize winner will receive a $1,000 gift certificate toward a romantic getaway weekend. Go to www.insureyourlove.org to learn more about the contest and to enter.

Life insurance is a lot more affordable then many seem to believe. And you are not limited to only the policy that your job or your husband job provides. I highly suggest you look into the different policies, understand their coverage and insure that your family and loved ones are taken care of if God forbid anything were to happen to you.

By sharing this information with you that I received from MomSelect I will be entered to win a $250 American Express gift card and Insure Your Love family Gift Basket filled with Valentine’s Day-themed children’s books, DVDs and toys.

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May God bless and protect your family during the holiday season. Continue to thank Him for all you have and always pray to Him for all that you need. Thank Him for His Son Chris Jesus and give praises about His glorious birth.

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Those are just a few of the qualities you learn being a follower of Christ. And today of all days we get the honor and privilege of sharing what we are thankful for with family and friends.

Every year brings new experiences, memories, challenges and rewards. This year my husband and I were blessed to conceive, develop and birth our first precious baby boy. We have been over joyed by the blessings this adventure has brought us so far. And love every moment we spend with him.

Just a few years back we would have not have thought that this time was possible. After an unfortunate miscarriage in 2005 and years of unsuccessful attempts we had almost given up trying to raise a family. But God showed his love and mercy on us this year and here I am writing this blog post with a precious (and quite adorable) baby sleeping on my chest.

That is what I am thankful for this year.

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1. Each year starting on November 1st we begin to express what we are thankful for. Each day we will write down something different until we get to Thanksgiving day. On that day in the morning we exchange the list with each other and read what the other person is thankful for. We love to see how many items we have in common. It is a good way for us to check if we are both still on the same page with our marriage, our hopes, dreams and appreciations.

2. On Thanksgiving night, before dinner we all gather around the table (extended family included) and we all share one thing we are thankful for with the family. This tradition has been in my husbands family for many years. I look forward to it each year now. This first year I participated before we were married I was a little nervous. The second year both my family and my then boyfriend’s family celebrated Thanksgiving dinner together. I was surprised when my boyfriend insisted on being last in line to share, only to find out he was using that opportunity to propose to me as we were surrounding by all of our family members. It was awesome. Oh and I said YES!!!

3. Our latest tradition started just last year. We call it ‘Secret Turkey’ Everyone has always pitched in and helped with Thanksgiving dinner. What is different now is each person gets to pick a dish they want to eat. Then we put the meals in a hat and some one else will make the dish for them. The fun part is on Thanksgiving day trying to guess who picked each dish.

Our son isn’t old enough to be able to participate in this activities yet but I am sure we can get him started next Thanksgiving. All of these have a personal meaning to us and brings our family closer together.

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This year though, National Grandparents Day took on a whole new meaning for me and my family. As most of you know my husband and I have been awaiting the arrival of our first child. Well we are excited to announce he finally made his appearance on Sept. 02. You can check out our birth experience here if you like. Just a few short days following his birth we had his grandparents drive down from Maryland to welcome him to the family. Along with them was my husbands grandmother. Her attendance is significant seeing that on both my side and my husbands she is the only living great grandparent remaining. I really wanted to make sure they had a moment to meet and bond before … well … you know. It was an emotional moment and wonderful gift for us all.

God bless family, especially grandparents for their wisdom, knowledge, experience and love they give.

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Lately my husband has had this thing with call me a hippie. I laughed along with him and took on the title proudly because I felt the reasoning behind his name calling were actually pretty good.

This all started about three months ago after a meeting with a lactation specialist. I decided that having our baby at a birthing center and not a hospital would be best for me, the baby and for my husband also. The further along we were with the pregnancy the more I studied, researched and analyzed the pros and cons of hospitals/treatments and birthing centers/coaching. I was, and still am, convinced that an intervention free birth was the right course. Now mind you this new belief of mine is coming right on the tails of us visiting and choosing one of the top, high tech, modern hospitals in the state. So I understood when my husband was just a tad bit sceptical but yet very supportive.

But my ‘hippiness’ according to him did not stop there. Shortly thereafter I started turning all Green on him.

I have to admit, majority of my life I have understood the importance of caring for the environment and being all aware of my actions and how the could effect our planet, but I was far from active. To me, turning off the water while brushing my teeth just seemed to be a bother … besides I was just one person.

Now however, and again I blame it solely on this baby soaking up the energy and brainwaves in my life, I have a totally different view on being environmental cautious and energy efficient. Not only for my babies health but also because majority of these changes save us tons of money (well maybe not tons, but enough).

What are my ways of going green so far???? These are just a start, I am sure there is much more we can do.

Recycling.When we first got our own place we really didn’t recycle that at all because we had a tiny apartment and the addition of another garbage pail just seemed way to inconvenient. Now if I see a coke can in the garbage I go crazy.

Cloth Diapering.I know I have mentioned this like twenty times before but we will be using cloth diapers. Saves loads of money and arguably better for the environment. For going out and possibly overnight we will be using the gDiaper system.

Reusable Bags. A few months back I decided to grad a bunch of those reusable bags for groceries. I can’t say that I have been 100% diligent with them yet though. Have forgotten them at home many times.

Cleaning Supplies. I have been reading up a lot on the different cleaning solutions you can make on your own at home using items you already have. I have a few friends that do it and they all say it cleans their home at good, if not better then the chemical stuff at stores … and yes again they save money.

Electricity. There are so many different ways to save on the electricity used daily. The main ways we have started is turning off all the lights when they aren’t needed. Turning off all electronics when not being used. Opening windows and using natural light.

 I am sure there are more ways that I am turning hippie, but off the top of my head that is what I have come up with so far.

 I did stop to really check this out though, and I don’t think I can actually call myself a modern day hippie yet. According to Robert Fuller there are just Four Types of Modern Day Hippies and looking at his definition of each, I don’t quit fall into one of those. The closets I come is the Granola Child but with out the vegetarian element, I love me some meat. So I think my husband and I will create our own definition one day.

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While my child isn’t quite old enough to enjoy … well about anything in the box yet (he’s still chilling in my belly), I do have friends with children who I knew would love to have fun with the toys and enjoy the snacks. So I called up my friends to see if they were willing to allow me to borrow their family for a couple of hours while we watched them enjoy the activities and took a few pics.

It is awesome to do participate in a sponsor program like this becuase no matter how much older I become, seeing those red Solo cups do always remind of summer being in the sun with friends and family having fun. Glad to see I’m not the only one that feels that way. No matter how many times they redesign their cups, its still the same Solo.

Summer Sponsored By Solo

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Not our real baby room ... I could only wish

This weekend my husband and I were blessed by family members and friends who came to celebrate with us during our babies shower. It was an awesome experience, loved being with everyone and really loved the gifts. It was so exciting to see all the different items that I will be using with my little one soon. I don’t know, maybe I am weird but even getting baby wipes made me excited and gave me that gooey warm motherly feeling.

And then it hit me …

Man we got a lot of stuff.

But did we get enough stuff? Do we have the right stuff? Are we missing any essential items? And where are we going to put it all (for the time being mom, dad and baby will be bunking together in one small room)?

Thankfully, I am planning for our baby at a time when we have an abundance of information at our finger tips. I was able to pull from many different resources and come up with a list that I think best covers at least the first year of life with your newborn. Then I thought to myself, this list is way too good to keep hidden, someone else out there would need this information also so I wanted to share this helpful it with you. Here is what I think would be essential for the first year of life.

Baby Gear

• Car Seats (don’t think you can go home with the baby without one in most states)
• Stroller
• Highchair (well I have a feeding seat for now, will see if that is sufficient enough)
• Gyms or Play arches

 Furniture

• Crib
• Crib Mattress (most cribs do not come with one so be prepared)
• Playpen / (Play yard)
• Changing table
• Dresser
• Rocker & Ottoman

 Clothing

• One-piece outfits (onesies)
• One-piece pajamas
• Sock and booties
• Fleece outfits / sweater or jacket: for winter
• Mittens
• Bonnet or cap: for summer
• Shoes

 Diapering

• Diapers
• Wipes
• Washcloth’s
• Diaper ointment / powder (pure cornstarch type powder)
• Diaper pail for soiled diapers (using cloth diapers so I skipped this one)

 Feeding

• Bibs
• Bottles & nipples (got a good supply but plan on breastfeeding only)
• Plastic Spill mats for around highchair.
• Plastic bowls
• Plastic sip cups
• Rubber tipped baby spoons

 Bathing

• Baby Tub
• Tub seat (when baby outgrows baby tub)
• Slip resistant bath tub mats
• Tub spout cover
• Washcloths (how could I have forgotten these … oops)
• Soaps & Lotions
• Hooded towels

Sleeping

• Waterproof crib / mattress liner
• Fitted Sheets for crib, bassinet or playard.
• Bumpers for crib sides
• Receiving blankets

Safety

• Baby Monitor
• Smoke alarm / carbon monoxide detector for baby’s room.
• Rectal thermometer
• First Aid kit
• Safety Gates
• Outlet covers
• Toilet seat latches
• Stove & Oven guards
• Cabinet & drawer latches
• Bumpers (for sharp cornered objects)

For Mom

• Nursing bras
• Breast pads
• Breast shields
• Cream for nipples
• Panty liners / pads (only needed for first few weeks or so after birth)
• Most items only needed while breastfeeding
• Flowers & gifts from dad (he better )

 Miscellaneous

• Small lamp or nightlight for baby’s room
• Classical or Lullaby music
• Reference books on safety issues, parenting, etc.
• Books that you can read to your baby
• Baby nail clippers
• Nasal aspirator
• Car seat & Stroller toys
• Crib Toys
• Dreft laundry soap

I feel this list is pretty comprehensible and complete and thankfully we currently have at least 95% of these items from our shower and other small purchases made throughout the months. It is my goal to make this list as accurate as possible so please let me know if I am missing some important items. Or if you feel there is something on this list that really isn’t necessary either let me know. Thanks for the feedback.

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Now, now I know some of you mothers out there had those same thoughts before your own bundle of joy(s) arrived in your life so don’t even go there with the … she’s so mean stuff.

But to be real, how can some one who has been so self-centered, self-serving and impatient bring a child into the world and be considered a good mother? Well that was my thought and mindset of this pregnancy up to recently. I has spent most of my pregnancy deny the reality of it all, and not really planning for the arrival of a new life. I had been going through the emotions and physical aspects of pregnancy and anticipating the delivery, but not really thinking of the aftermath, the newborn baby. From the way I was feeling I didn’t think there was anyway for me to get ride of my fears of being an uncaring mean mommy.

It wasn’t until my 22nd week of pregnancy when the motherly feeling finally hit me. My hubby and I were attending a breastfeeding education class at Babies R Us (yes that is right, my husband came with me because he cares.) Up to then, everything we had been reading, watching and learning was focused on the pregnancy and birth. This was the first thing that we experienced that discussed what to do with the little one after he came out of the protection of the womb and into my arms. For the first time I closed my eyes and envisioned holding and breastfeeding this little baby boy. It was one of those surreal day dreams with smoke and the lights and mirrors the right music playing in the back ground. It was then that I realized … I love this child … and I’m going to do what it takes to be the best mother on this great green planet.

From then on, I would skim through the weekly updates on how the pregnancy is developing but my primary focus has been to read up on any and everything I could think of to ensure my baby will be taken care of in my home. You name it, I am reading on it, and if I haven’t yet, I will be now. From hygiene, to education, to nutrition, to safety, I’m trying to be a walking source of ‘what to do when …’ facts for my baby.

Milestone moment: How I knew I had truly arrived into the motherly realm. We were in public, I think it was Olive Gardens, waiting to be served and there it was … a crying baby just tables away from us. But what did I do, I turned and looked at the family and smiled at the mother who was attempting to ease the child’s tears. My smile wasn’t out of pity or frustration, it was out of hope. It was a smile of reassurance to the mother that she will figure out what her baby needs and she will overcome this small obstacle today.

No more Miss Meany Lady.

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